What Changed My Life?

Pascal the great physicist and philosopher said, “There is a God-shaped vacuum in the heart of each man, which cannot be satisfied by any created thing, but only by God the Creator made known through Jesus Christ.”  It wasn’t until I was 15 that I became blatantly aware of this vacuum.  At that time my mom died, and my whole world was turned upside down.  After she died I tried to fill my emptiness and need for love through guys, friendships, and popularity.   But I found that no one could satisfy my need for love, and no thing, could fill that vacuum.  I soon realized that mom’s death was not the cause of the vacuum, it had always been there; I had just become aware of it. 

As long as I can remember I have always had a desire, a longing in my heart to know God.  As a child I can remember saying to my mother that if Jesus was who He said He was, He should make a difference in people’s lives.  I knew there had to be more to Christianity than what I saw in the lives of the people around me at church.  What I read in the Bible about the lives of the disciples I had never seen before in reality. 

My junior year I began to read about people whose lives were changed as a result of coming into a personal relationship with Jesus Christ.  The guy I was dating at that time took me to a high school youth group.  As I walked in I saw that these people were different.  They had a love and peace within them that I'd never seen before.  What I knew as a child had to be true, and what I had read about, I saw right before my eyes. 

On November 28, 1971 someone finally explained to me why Jesus died for me.  I knew and believed He “died for my sins”, but I didn’t understand what that meant.  This person explained that God loves me and created me to have a personal relationship with Him.  I grew up hearing that God loved me, but I never had heard about having a personal relationship with God before I started reading those books. 

This person then explained that all of us have sinned, we are all imperfect and self-centered, and that that sin separates us from God.  I was told that the Bible teaches that there is nothing that I can do on my own to bridge this separation – being good won’t do it, going to church won’t do it.  I could never be good enough, or do enough because the separation is too wide between me and a Holy and perfect God.  And so because of this, Jesus died to pay the penalty for my sin by taking my place, and bridging that separation that I and you are unable to bridge through our own efforts. 

I learned that all I needed to do was to acknowledge my sin and my need for Christ and what He had done for me - to put my trust in His death and resurrection alone for my salvation, and ask Christ to come into my life to be my Savior and my Lord.  So that is exactly what I did that night.  I asked Christ to come into my life, to forgive me, and to be both my Savior and my Lord. 

I began a relationship with Christ that night and discovered that what Pascal said was true.  The vacuum in my life was a God-shaped vacuum, and after trying to find satisfaction in other things and people I found that Jesus is the only one that can fill my emptiness and He is the only one who has the capacity to love me like I need to be loved.  Not only did Christ fill the vacuum, He gave me a whole new perspective on life and people.  He changed my attitudes, which began to change how I acted on the outside. 

I began to love people unconditionally and look at life’s circumstances in a whole different way.  This wasn’t anything that I tried to change, but God began changing me from the inside out.  

I had been seeking to know God all of my life and finally I found Him.  I have never been the same since.  I started a love relationship with the God who created me that night.  His love fills my life and my heart as He continues to change me day by day and smooth off the rough edges that still need work. 

I would have accepted Christ many years earlier, if only someone would have taken the time to explain what Christ’s death had accomplished for me and how I could have a personal relationship with Him.  How many people are out there waiting to hear, just like I was?